I hear a lot of swingers, especially new swingers asking if it is better to go to a commercial swinger club or a private swinger house party? Let’s explore that question and compare some of the pros and cons of both swinger clubs and private parties. Let’s start off by looking at some of the pros and cons of attending a swinger club. Then we will move on and look at some of the pros and cons of attending a private swinger party. At the end of the article, I’ll even tell you some of my final thoughts and how I would choose what type of swinger party I would like to attend.
Swinger Lifestyle Clubs Pros and Cons
Let’s look at both the pros and cons of attending swinger clubs. We will start off by looking at some of the pros and will then look at some of the cons.
Pros of Attending Swinger Lifestyle Clubs
Club Amenities and Facilities: Many swinger lifestyle clubs have a number of amenities and a range of facilities for their guests. Including, group sex rooms, orgy rooms, private sex rooms, voyeur rooms, themed sex rooms, bars with attendants, dining areas, catered dinners and breakfast, DJ, dance floor, etc. Many swinger clubs also provide lockers, towels, and condoms for the use of their guests. Some even have theater rooms, hot tubs, and swimming pools.
Regular and Themed Events: Most swinger lifestyle clubs hold themed parties. For example, ladies in men’s shirts, no panties night, newbie night, little black dress night, running of the bulls night, fetish nights, pole dance contests, hotwife nights, etc. Most swinger clubs also have couples only nights, and specific nights that they allow single men to enter. If you look around at the different swinger clubs, you will most likely find one that has themed parties that interest you.
Large Variety of People: Swinger clubs have larger crowds and attract a large variety of people. When attending a swinger club, you will find couples from different nationalities, of difference sizes and ages, and have a high variety of sexual beliefs. You will find couples and singles with different kinks, and different swinger experience levels. You will find swingers that only soft swap, or are voyeurs only, and ones that do full swap. The diversity of the people you will meet and encounter at swinger clubs will be larger than when attending swinger private parties.
A More Structured and Controlled Environment: A commercial swinger club often has clear rules and guidelines for guests attending the club. Almost all swinger clubs require proof of age and legal ID to enter. Most swinger clubs also provide some type of security to help ensure safety and consent of their guests.
Guest Screening: Some swinger clubs even vet members to help reduce the risk of unsafe or incompatible attendees. Some even have strict dress codes all guests must follow to enter the club.
Anonymity: Swinger clubs are a business and usually run like one. There is less personal connection to the club hosts, employees, and guests. This can allow for more privacy as a newcomer. This gives you the opportunity to play a new persona if you desire, since most likely nobody knows you at the swinger club. You can basically become whoever you want and leave your vanilla life unknown to the club guests.
Cons of Attending Swinger Lifestyle Clubs
High Cost: Swinger clubs usually charge a high entrance fee, and a recurring membership fee. This high cost can put swinger clubs out of reach for many swinger couples, except for special occasions.
Can Feel Impersonal: Since swinger clubs can bring in large crowds, especially on Friday and Saturday nights, they may feel less intimate than a private swinger party. The large crowds can also feel very overwhelming for some swingers, especially couples new to swinging.
Rules and Restrictions: Swinger clubs usually have strict rules and restrictions. For example, no phones, and strict dress codes. Swinger clubs can also have strict rules about where and when you can be nude in the club. Swinger clubs also normally have strict rules about who can go in the playrooms. For example, no unescorted males in the playrooms. All males, both married and single must be escorted by a woman to enter the playrooms or areas. These strict rules and restrictions can limit your personal freedoms to just roam around the club or dress the way you want in different areas of the swinger club.
Highly Variable Atmosphere: This one I personally consider a big one in the list of swinger lifestyle club cons. The actual atmosphere in the club and the vibe of the club can change from day to day. You may go one time and have a great time with a lot of great swingers. Then, the next time you go, hardly anyone is at the club, or you find that you don’t vibe with anyone. Almost everything depends on the crowd that attends a club party. Swinger clubs can be hit-or-miss. Even the same night of the week may feel different each from week to week.
Pressure: Since most swinger clubs put off a strong sexual vibe and have large open sexual areas of the club, some couples, especially new couples to swinging may feel pressured to participate. Then, later that night or the next day, wish they had not. Swinger clubs have a lot higher pressure to participate than private parties. And it is easier to just get caught up in the moment.
Private Swinger Parties Pros and Cons
Let’s look at both the pros and cons of attending private swinger parties. We will start off by looking at some of the pros and will then look at some of the cons.
Pros of Attending Private Swinger Parties
Lower Cost: Most private house parties do not have an entry fee. Some may ask for donations to help cover expenses. Others may even ask you to bring something like a covered dish, snacks, or drinks to contribute to the party. So, private swinger parties are a lot cheaper than commercial swingers clubs.
Exclusivity: Private swinger parties are usually much smaller, and the guests are either vetted or know each other well. This makes it so you can feel more comfortable and even a little special being a guest. It’s actually a privilege to be invited to a private swinger party. Private parties are more like getting together with close friends instead of going to a nightclub.
Trust and Comfort: Invitations to a private swinger party are only sent out to swingers known by the host or known by a special guest. Since the group of guests are familiar to the host, and most if not all the guests know each other, you tend to feel safer going to a private swinger party.
Intimate Setting: Since most private swinger parties are held at the host’s home and have a much smaller guest list than a swinger club, this fosters deeper connections between the guests and a lot more relaxed vibe and atmosphere.
Flexibility: Private swinger parties tend to have a lot fewer rules than a commercial swinger club. Private swinger parties also tend to have more activities and themes based on the guest’s preferences. With fewer rules and more customized guest experiences, private parties are a lot more flexible than swinger clubs.
More Personal: The bottom line is that private swinger parties are a lot more personal than commercial swinger clubs.
Cons of Attending Private Swinger Parties
Limited Variety of Guests: Private swinger parties are almost always a lot smaller than commercial swinger club parties. This means a much less diverse crowd of potential play partners. If you are new to the swinger lifestyle, you may have a better chance of meeting compatible play partners at a swinger club, instead of a private swinger party.
Access: Getting invited to a private swinger party can be difficult, especially for new swingers. To get an invite to a private swinger party, you usually have to know someone that is holding a party to get invited.
Amenities: Since the majority of private swinger parties are held in the hosts home, they may lack the facilities and space a commercial swinger club offers. The play areas may be much more limited, and the majority of private swinger parties do not offer private play areas. Bathroom facilities are usually much more limited also. Parking for a private swinger party may be very limited, or not at all. You may be required to take a ride share or taxi to the private party.
Higher Privacy Risks: Some private party hosts or their guests may not prioritize anonymity and privacy as much as swinger lifestyle clubs.
Inconsistent Party Quality: The lack of professional oversight and staff may sometimes result in a disorganized or possibly unsafe party event.
Final Thoughts About Swinger Clubs vs Private Parties
Now that you know some of the pros and cons of attending swinger clubs and private swinger parties, let’s decide what one would be better for you.
Swinger Clubs: Attending swinger clubs may be a better choice for those seeking a structured swinger party environment, lots of amenities, and a larger variety of potential play partners. If anonymity is important to you, attending a swinger club may be the better choice. Just keep in mind that all of this comes with a much higher cost and less intimacy.
Private Swinger Parties: Attending private swinger parties may be a better choice for those that prefer a more personal, relaxed, and lower cost swinger experience. If you prefer to get to know many other guests, a private swinger party is a much better choice. Private swinger parties do lack variety and professional oversight though.
Choose swinger clubs or private swinger parties, based on your comfort level, budget, and preference over intimacy or variety. Or, better yet, why not try both and see which experience you prefer. Nothing wrong with attending both swinger clubs and private swinger parties.
