Picking up a stranger at a bar or nightclub for a threesome can be fun, exciting and downright scary all at the same time. But the benefits of being successful can be very pleasurable for you and your partner.
Let’s explore how to pick up a stranger at a bar or nightclub for a threesome. Here are the basic steps that will be covered in this article.
- Selecting the Right Bar or Nightclub for Picking up a Stranger for a Threesome
- Standout and Be Noticed in the Bar When Looking for a Threesome Partner
- Subtly Advertise You Are Looking for a Threesome
- How to Approach Someone the Two of You Are Interested in Having a Threesome With
- Now It’s Time to Steer the Conversation Towards Sexual Topics
- How to Determine if the Possible Threesome Partner Is Bi-Sexual or Bi-Curious
- How to Drop Hints That You Two Are Interested in Them Joining You for a Threesome
- How to Ask Someone to Join the Two of You for a Threesome
Now that you know the basic steps to picking up stranger for a threesome in a bar or nightclub, let’s move on and go over each step in detail.
How to Pick up a Stranger at a Bar or Nightclub for a Threesome
First thing to know is that picking up a stranger in a bar or nightclub for a threesome is going to be a team effort. Of course, you could have one partner do all the flirting and do the actual picking up, but it’s going to be a lot more fun if the two of you take this adventure together.
I’ll be using the words wife and girlfriend interchangeably. As well as husband and boyfriend interchangeably throughout this article.
Let’s start off with how to select the best bar or nightclub to pick up a stranger for a threesome.
Selecting the Right Bar or Nightclub for Picking up a Stranger for a Threesome
Selecting the right bar or nightclub to pick up a stranger for a threesome is extremely important. You will find some bars and clubs a much better hunting ground than others.
When looking for the best bar or nightclub for the two of you to pick up a stranger for a threesome, keep the following in mind.
I’ll be using the word bar from now on to mean either a bar or nightclub to make things easier to read.
Look at the layout of the bar. Does it allow for easy mingling with other people? Can you find a table or location that the two of you can have a good view of the bar?
Does the bar have a dance floor? Are people using it? A dance floor makes picking up someone a lot easier. You can get up close and personal with a stranger by dancing with them. Especially dancing to a slow song.
Does the bar have a DJ? If the two of you have found someone that interests you, get them on the dance floor and ask the DJ to play a slow song next. Just assume that they want to dance a second dance and put your arms around them and start dancing. This is a great way to judge their interest in the person dancing with them.
Does the bar have any type of games? Video games? Pool tables? How about darts? These can all be used as ice breakers to get to know any possible candidates for a threesome. They also give you a lot of opportunities to flirt with strangers in a teasing fashion.
How is the noise level in the bar? Can you hold a conversation with someone without shouting? Or do they at least have an area in the bar that is quieter? It’s hard to pick someone up if you can’t actually talk with them for a while.
Does the bar provide entertainment? If they do, you can always mention how much you are enjoying the entertainment to a stranger just in passing. Entertainment can give nice opportunities to strike up a conversation.
Does the bar serve food? Ask the person the two of you are interested in if they have tried the food here and if so, what they recommend. You can thank them for their recommendation a little later.
Does the bar hold themed parties or contests? Any type of sexually energized event can help to lower the inhibitions of people. Good events would include toga parties, sexy dress parties, lingerie parties, sex trivia nights, bare as you dare contests, and wet t-shirt contests.
Many areas have two types of bars. Local bars where the locals hang out and tourist bars where the tourists go.
If you are looking for a one-night stand, a tourist bar may be the best choice. Many tourists when on vacation have a tendency to let their hair down more.
If the two of you are more interested in having multiple encounters with the same person, a local’s bar may be the better choice for your threesome hunting grounds.
Whatever bar or nightclub you choose, you will want to stand out and be noticed. Let’s look at how to stand out and get noticed next.
Standout and Be Noticed in the Bar When Looking for a Threesome Partner
When you go to a bar or nightclub to look for possible threesome partners, the two of you need to stand out and be noticed. You don’t want to blend into the woodwork.
If the two of you are wall flowers, it’s going to be extremely difficult to attract a stranger for a possible threesome. So, do whatever the two of you need to do, to come out of your shells.
You should be seen as the fun-loving couple that everyone wants to meet and hangout with. Don’t go overboard. Make your relationship appear to be fun and exciting. If you can find ways to make it look like the two of you are in a very happy open relationship, make that happen too.
Laugh it up, mingle, invite people to have a drink with you. If the bar has games, invite people to play with the two of you. At this point, you are not going after that stranger for a threesome just yet. You are just trying to make yourselves look fun and approachable.
Move around the bar and get to know the people that are there. Just have some fun.
Once you have gotten to know several people in the bar, it’s time to start subtly advertising you are looking for a threesome. Let’s explore how to do this next.
Subtly Advertise You Are Looking for a Threesome
Subtly advertising that the two of you are into and possibly looking for a threesome can increase your odds of finding a stranger to have a threesome with greatly.
This step can be skipped but I highly recommend that you don’t. Use this step to your advantage.
One of the best ways to subtly advertise you are into threesomes is by using jewelry. Let me give you some examples of the types of jewelry and how to use it to your advantage when hunting for a stranger to pick up for a threesome.
Let’s start with the jewelry options. Most of the jewelry available is for women, but there are some suitable for a man to wear.
Women can wear bracelets, anklets and necklaces that have gender symbols or words on them. Here are some examples.
The jewelry piece could contain two male gender symbols and one female gender symbol. Or it could contain two female gender symbols and one male gender symbol. Just select the one that represents what you are looking for that night.
Another option is selecting jewelry that contains words on it or hanging from it. The ones that come to mind have words like hotwife, I’m the middle spoon, threesome coach, like threesomes? etc.
The options for men include paracord and leather bracelets with gender charms or words on it. You can also find men’s rings with swinger symbols on them.
Now, let’s look at how to use the jewelry to advertise that you are into and are looking for a threesome with a stranger.
The types of jewelry I just mentioned can be used to start conversations. All you need to do is make sure your possible threesome prospect sees it and asks about it.
You can fidget with it while talking to them. Or, if the jewelry has a question on it, make sure they notice it and read it. You could also just show it to them and ask, what do you think?
Another option is to wear clothing with sayings or images on it that are threesome or group sex oriented. Sayings could be simple and straight forward. Like, I’m the middle spoon, I love threesomes, etc.
Clothing could also contain images like gender symbols or swinger symbols. Another image that can be a conversation starter is an upside-down pineapple.
Put your thinking cap on and see if the two of you can come up with other ways to subtly advertise you are looking for a threesome.
Now that you have some ideas on how to subtly advertise that you are looking for a threesome, let’s dive in to how to approach someone the two of you are interested in sexually.
How to Approach Someone the Two of You Are Interested in Having a Threesome With
Your initial approach to someone the two of you may be interested in having a threesome with is extremely important as it either sets them at ease or on the defense.
You want the person to be comfortable meeting the two of you and to see the two of you as someone they would possibly like to get to know.
Most of the time it’s going to be better if only one of you approaches the person instead of the two of you together. You want the initial approach to go smooth and not look creepy or overwhelming to them.
The initial approach usually goes much smoother if the woman does the approaching instead of the man. This is not always the case though. Use your judgment on which one of you should be the initial one to approach a possible threesome partner.
When approaching a stranger, keep in mind that the initial approach is to get them to talk to the two of you and possibly sit down and have a drink with the two of you. It’s not seduction time just yet. Unless of course, they start putting moves on you first. Then, being more aggressive is fine.
Make sure to use anything in the bar to help with the initial approach. If they have video games, pool tables, or darts, ask them if they would like to play a game. This is usually a great approach tactic. So, use what the bar has to offer to make the approach easier.
The way you approach a woman will usually be a little different than the way you would approach a man. Let’s look at ways to approach a woman first.
If the woman approaches the woman the two of you are interested in, it usually goes better mainly because she won’t have her guard up. When a man approaches a woman, she usually puts her guard up expecting to be hit on.
If you see the girl heading towards the bathroom, the female partner can head to the bathroom also. Then strike up some small talk while waiting in line or while in the bathroom.
A girl can also approach a girl to ask her where she got something she is wearing.
If the man approaches the woman, he should go in and compliment her about something. Or tell her that his wife thought her hair, nails or something she is wearing looked really good on her but was embarrassed to come over and tell her.
A fun way to double team the girls is to have the guy walk by her and compliment her about something and then immediately tease her about something. For example, walk by and just casually mention that she has a really eye catching smile. Then, touch your nose and tell her she has a little something on it. At that time walk away.
Now the guy should head to the bathroom or another part of the bar.
It’s time for the female to approach her and apologize about her husband getting loose. Make a statement after that something similar to this. I hope he was not bothering you too much. Then laugh it off and strike up a conversation about how men are.
Now, let’s look at ways to approach a man.
Guys are pretty easy to approach. Let’s look at an example of the man approaching first and then the way a woman can approach the man.
The man can approach him with the intent of simply asking a question about the bar. Just go up and stand near the guy and when the time is right, ask a simple question. Try to move it to a little guy talk if possible. You can then bring up your wife and wave her over to introduce her to him.
Now, if the woman approaches the man, she can go in with a little flirting to see if the guy shows any interest in her. If she does this, it is very important that the two of you have made it clear by your actions that the two of you are a couple. You should have already done that by your actions earlier when you came into the bar.
If the guy flirts back a little or just seems to be enjoying your small talk, ask him if he would like to join the two of you for a drink and take a load off his feet if he is standing.
Once the initial approach has been made to either a man or woman, you need to bring up and introduce your partner. It’s usually best to talk about them a little before the introduction. It could be as easy as you signaling to your partner secretly to walk by and then introducing them.
If all goes well, ask her or him to join the two of you for a drink. Once the three of you have chatted a bit, it’s time to move the conversation towards sexual topics. Let’s explore how to do just that next.
Now It’s Time to Steer the Conversation Towards Sexual Topics
After a little small talk and when you can tell the possible threesome partner is comfortable chatting with the two of you, it’s time to move the conversation to the sexual topics.
During this phase, you want to judge how they are responding to sexual talk. Are they showing an interest? Or are they starting to look and sound insecure? You can always back down a bit and ease them slower into talking about sex. Don’t rush this process, but don’t take forever either. If things don’t work out, you want time to hunt down your next possible threesome partner.
If you are wearing any of the jewelry I mentioned earlier, it’s time to start fiddling with it a little. Don’t be in your face with it. Just act like you are a little nervous and play with it just a little.
Here are some sample topics you can bring up with him or her.
You could start a conversation by asking them what the wildest thing is they have ever done. Listen carefully and see if you can use anything they say to move the conversation to something sexual.
The idea is to get them to ask what the wildest thing is the two of us have ever done. Once they ask something like that the woman should say something like; I know something we did that could blow your mind. But first let me ask you, how do you feel about swinging?
If they seem to respond well to that question, you can tell them about one of the sexual adventures the two of you have had. The idea is to get the conversation moved to topics about group sex, partner swapping, threesomes and the like.
The better they respond, the deeper you should go into things. If they ever clam up a bit, back off for a bit go from there.
Remember, you are not asking them to join you for a threesome just yet. You are just getting them to relax and talk about sex openly. You want to make sure they see sex as a recreational activity.
If the two of you are looking for a third that is bi-sexual, it’s time to determine if they are or not.
How to Determine if the Possible Threesome Partner Is Bi-Sexual or Bi-Curious
If you or your partner is bi-sexual or bi-curious, it would be very nice to know if the person you are wanting to have a threesome with is bi-sexual or bi-curious. They may even be bi-curious and not even know it yet.
Of course, if both of you are straight, you can skip this step and move on to actually dropping hints about them possibly joining the two of you for a threesome.
You could drop comments about how hot it is to see two girls dance with each other or how it turns you on to see two girls kiss.
If the third is female, you could ask her what types of girls does she like? Then see how she responds.
Just steer the conversation to bisexuality and get them talking about how they feel about it.
You could test the waters by touching the person in a non-threatening way and see how they respond. Maybe just touch them on the forearm while talking to them. If they don’t pull back, you could try placing a hand on their thigh and see how they respond.
If you are not comfortable with flirting with them not knowing if they are bi-sexual or not, you could just come out and ask them. Or possibly mention in passing that you or your partner is bi-sexual or bi-curious.
Now let’s move on to actually dropping hints that the two of you are interested in having them join you for a threesome.
How to Drop Hints That You Two Are Interested in Them Joining You for a Threesome
So, everything has gone well so far with getting to know the person the two of you are wanting to have a threesome with. Now, it’s time to start dropping hints that the two of you are interested in them joining you for a threesome.
The idea of dropping hints is to see if they seem perceptive to the possibility of a threesome before actually asking them to join you in bed.
If you do this step very well, you may have them asking to join the two of you for a threesome instead of the two of you asking them.
Here are several ways you can drop hints about a possible threesome without outright asking.
If the bar has a dance floor and a slow song is played, ask them to dance. While on the dance floor you can let your hands roam a little to see how they respond. You can also have a conversation with them while dancing.
You could make statements about how your partner finds them attractive and turns them on. Or, if it’s the girls dancing together you could say something along the lines of, I bet the two of us are driving my husband crazy watching us. Let’s give him a show.
While the three of you are talking, you could move the conversation to talking about each other’s fantasies. You could mention that one of your main fantasies is having threesomes. Then ask them if they have had a similar fantasy.
If you are wearing the jewelry I mentioned before, it’s time to basically get in their face with it. If you have to, show it to them and ask them what they think of it. When you get them looking at it closely, tell them what it means.
Keep the conversation sexual in nature and bring up swinging again. Let them know that the two of you enjoy it.
If the bar has games, you could challenge them to play one of the games. Make a wager that if they win, the two of you will take them home with them and you will give them a body massage as the prize. You can also toss in cooking breakfast for them. Just don’t mention sex or a threesome when making the wager. Let their imagination fill in the missing details. Just make the bet in a fun and sarcastic way.
If everything feels right, it’s time to actually invite them home with you for a threesome. Let’s look at ways to do that next.
How to Ask Someone to Join the Two of You for a Threesome
Now that you know that they are being at least a little perceptive to a possible threesome, it’s time to actually ask them to join the two of you for sex.
Here are some ways to ask them to join the two of you for a threesome.
If they have been very forward to your sexual conversations and advances, you could just flat out ask them to come home with the two of you.
If your prospective threesome partner is a male, the female partner could tell him about how she really enjoys having two guys at the same time. Then ask if he would be interested in being one of them.
Or the guy partner could talk to the male and tell him how his wife is really getting turned on by him. Then mention how she is into having two guys at the same time and ask him if he would like to help satisfy her sexually.
If your possible third is a female, it’s usually easier to have the male partner leave the two females alone for a bit. This way the female partner can talk more openly about the possibility of her joining for a threesome.
If you get her to agree, then the two of you should go looking for the male partner to let him know that she will be joining the two of you for a threesome.
If the female has been flirting with the guy heavily, the guy could pop the question to her about joining the two of you for sex.
When getting ready to ask the person about a threesome, the one they have been flirting back with the most should be the one to ask.
It’s almost always best for the partner that is not asking, to leave the other two alone so the possible third does not feel they are being double teamed or pushed into it.
The more of a connection you have made with the possible threesome partner the two of you have made, the better your chances of getting them to join you.
